As FOMO became a widespread term, JOMO began to surface as a topic of discussion. “JOMO” is the JOY of missing out. When you delight in cancelling plans, putting on those sweatpants, and are happy to have your very own party of one, you’re engaging with JOMO.
JOMO isn’t just about distracting yourself from your social media world. It’s about a shift in mindset that can be really powerful. “JOMO is the satisfaction one feels in the current moment, with accompanying acceptance of what one doesn’t have in that moment,” says Sullivan-Windt. “Life satisfaction increases with intentionality and actively choosing things one finds fulfilling.”
It’s not specifically about feeling joy all the time, so much as being in the present moment and being grateful for what is happening currently; both of which are positively associated with well-being.
As anxiety rises in the world, it becomes even more important to learn to be in the moment, rather than ruminating about the past, dwelling on what other people are doing, or anticipating the future.
“Given how social media encourages comparisons, I often recommend clients take a break from social media or otherwise be intentional in how and how much they engage with social media. Without the distraction of social media, it is that much easier to enjoy personal time,” says Sullivan-Windt.
Doing What You Want To Do Vs Should Do
If you’re having trouble letting go of that feeling of obligation even after you unplug, Cook encourages you to do what she calls “play the tape.” It goes like this: ask yourself “How would you feel if you stayed in? If you went out?” Imagining how you would feel can be a helpful indicator of when you need to lean in or lean out.
Another great way to practice this is to experiment with it. See how it feels to stay at home in some instances while choosing to go out in others. While your mood will likely determine what you want to do, the key is to tune in to what YOU want to do. Take the pressure off from what you think you SHOULD do and instead go with your gut,” Cook says.
9 Habits That Increase Jomo
Learning to appreciate your gut feeling instead of feeling sick to your stomach?
- Use your senses
Focusing on our senses, like the sound of the ocean lapping up on the shore, the smell of the coconut sunblock, the feel of the sun warming your body, and the view of the boat in the vista ensures that we are in the present. This is a meditation 101 kind of thinking. So, maybe you’re not on the beach somewhere, but you can still notice the subtle, pleasant things around you, maybe it’s the way raindrops are sliding down a window.
- Stop multi-tasking
When you’re showering, only focus on the experience of showering. Just wash the dishes; be present without phone calls, music, or podcasts to distract you.
Take 4 deep breathes and focus on the breath. If you are truly focused on your breath, there is nowhere else for your mind to go.
- Practice gratitude
Taking time to note all things one can be thankful for helps us focus on what ‘is’ rather than what ‘could be.
- Give yourself three mindful minutes every day
That’s all it takes. Using an app like the Calm app or Headspace can be a great way to practice a guided meditation.
- Smell your food
This goes back to the point about your senses and is a practical way to make it a habit. Engage in more than just taste when you eat a meal. Smelling a tangerine as you peel it or savouring the smell of cookies baking in the oven brings you right to the here and now.
- Ground yourself
You might have heard of this one if you have anxiety. Noting the texture of the chair you’re sitting in, how it feels to note the texture of your hands and sensing the shoes on your feet are all ways to bring you into your present physical experience.
- Look into someone’s eyes
Even when we’re having conversations, we rarely look one another in the eyes. Slow down and really sink into eye contact with someone. See how it slows down the rapidity of life.
- Go for a walk
Whether you listen to music or talk with someone, using your physical body to be in your present environment can be hugely connecting to the here and now.